Today I wrote a card to my great grandmother-in-law. Yes, you read that right. My husband and I are in our forties and he still has three grandparents alive and thriving. She lives far away and her husband passed just a year ago. I was chatty and included hard copy pictures. It took me perhaps fifteen minutes to write it and I made sure to write out the envelope first before I started the card so I would immediately put it together and put a stamp on it. And send it.  What it will mean to her is immeasurable and it’s just this sort of thing that I think I need to make more effort to do much more often.

Making a mark

 Poems are written for gifts and often the gifts can be joke ones or silly. When we were little, my younger sister would wrap a gift with multiple layers, each one to a different person with a different poem. These days we are less about silly and more about fun or useful and we give two or three smallish presents per person.  The poems are what sets the whole thing apart from other celebrations. Instead of a rip fest, each person carefully opens the poem and reads it one at a time,  then opens the gifts. We take turns and we laugh and admire each other’s mastery or really bad poetry. I love limericks, multiple stanzas. My twin sister loves haikus.  Writing the poems give a whole other layer of joy in giving the gift. You can tease about what the present is or how the person will use or even completely mislead them and then give them a huge surprise. Each poem is always from Sint even though we know who is really giving the gift.

This year I am giving some eagerly awaited things to my family. My neice Boo wanted something specific and I wound up getting it shipped from China. I will be wrapping it in the packaging it came in which will give her a thrill.  Last year I gave my sister a TomTom and at first she was dubious as to whether she would use it but found she loved it. The poem I wrote for it is here:

The history of maps is quite varied

Medieval mappers were quite harried

Jerusalem in the centre

it was the world’s inventor

small versions of it were then carried

Ptolemy invented the first real map

Quite a feather for anyone’s cap

His Guide to geography

A pinnacle in cartography

Was dumped in the Renaissances’ lap

Copper plate engraving became the norm

With coastlines, rivers, and true to form

Compass lines were added

The first globes weren’t padded

The first real map took all by storm.

Modern mapping became national sport

With countries gathering details to consort

With aerial photography

Mapping the geography

Exact details were theirs to import.

Satellites became the keys to precision

new details under constant revision

just download a new version

with no virus incursion

She thought her life was over. All her favourite things like cookies and noodles and cheese and ice cream were suddenly gone. I promised her that whatever was on the dinner table was safe for her to eat. Everything. So I started to learn about gf options for her. At first is was the EnergE rice bread, rice crackers and sun butter or almond butter and popcorn that she ate a ton of. We branched out. It took a while but we got it down.

For my entire life I have had odd symptoms  that I would occasionally mention to a doctor.  Arthritis at 15? Just one of those things. Not sleeping through the night for the last 12 years? Sorry to hear that? Hungry all the time? You’re not eating enough protein. Then I started to get bronchitis or pneumonia or even pleuritis at least once a year. Every virus that went past me I had to sample. At that point my naturopath  friend Christine Doherty asked, pleaded and begged to test me like we had my daughter years before.  The results stupefied Christine as she had never seen a result before like mine. Plus 3 (the reading for the blood antibody test) on dairy, wheat, gluten, soy, eggs, peanuts and Very Low on everything else. She told me I could take a bit of time taking them out of my diet, but I thought I would do it in one fell swoop. It took about four days but I was suddenly not hungry all the time, my brain felt clean and I was sleeping!!

Life changed dramatically after that. I used to drink soy protein shakes all the time because I was always hungry. Suddenly I couldn’t do soy. When I did I got this horrible stomach ache, only on my left side, that left me writhing in pain. SO not doing that again. Dairy made me sleep badly and eggs made me tired. New comfort foods had to be found. I discovered amazing new products but had to disregard them when they had ingredients I couldn’t have.

At this point I eat a bit of dairy and eggs but still stay away from soy and never ever ever cheat on gluten. When I get glutened I am hungry like I haven’t eaten in days and I have such a headache. I don’t sleep much either afterwards.

My favourite products are varied but here is a short list. Rice noodles from Trader Joes are excellent and can be used in casseroles and soups and so many other things. Schaar products are newer to the US but they are the number one gluten-free company in Europe. Their dinner rolls are perfect as hamburger buns and what a joy to have a hamburger with a bun again. Schaar pasta is as much like traditional wheat pasta as you can get. I just got used to the rice pastas so I prefer them. As for gluten-free breads. Well. I eat a ton of the Deland Bakery frozen millet bread. Toasts like wheat bread and has a great crunch. So my new comfort food became toast with almost butter and jam. The Really Great Food Company has a line of mixes that are really excellent and yummy. Their chocolate cake coupled with Homestyle frosting from Dunkin Hines is our new traditional birthday cake and it’s moist and delicious.

We’re discovering new products all the time and I have adapted like I never imagined I could or would. To help supplement my diet I take Dr. Doherty’s C-liac Vitality Pack,  a one a day multivitamin and mineral plus essential fatty acids that are certified gluten free and seriously convenient. You can order them here http://glutenfreevitamins.com/shop/home.php. She practices in Millford, New Hampshire in her clinic, Balance Point Natural Medicine.

Have a safe and fun Thanksgiving. We’re having all the traditional recipes and ALL of them will be gluten-free.

There was a nip in the air today, one that I would swear is snow is on the horizon. Not quite yet, as the forecast  has rain but not snow. Yet. Coming from much further north I am getting itchy that the weather is far too warm for this time of year. I can’t wait to have a blizzard coming, to know that school will certainly be canceled and that all my loved ones will be safe and snug in the house. Stew will be simmering and perhaps a loaf of gf bread will be in the oven. Or chocolate chip cookies.

This is the view from my window as I work at my computer in my office. I hope this winter is not a repeat of last. When once the excitement of a rare snow day gave way to so many that we actually got tired of them. That is like getting tired of good chocolate! The ice storm of Dec 11 was a freak thing that knocked out power in some places for weeks. We only lost it for three and a half days but that was long enough. Our town had 10 days of school missed because our middle schools were the town shelters for those still without power. Once the sun came out and started melting the ice, thing turned gorgeous but still dangerous. The tips of the icicles started dripping off the tops of the trees below and the sound of falling ice was everwhere. Hopefully this was a once in a lifetime event.

Getting ready for snow is fun. Let the flakes come soon!

Have a terrific Thanksgiving celebration everyone. This year it’s a second year in a row for the Trader Joes’ brined turkey. I am making it entirely gf with the rice and raisin stuffing I grew up with which was always gluten-free. I found an amazing chocolate cream pie recipe with coconut milk and XD is making a pumpkin pie with the same awesome stuff. Can’t wait. Our families have started new traditions and we’re so excited to celebrate together. Much to be thankful for. Enjoy.

Wasn’t it just yesterday I was pinning her gloves to her coat and walking her to bus stop? I know in about a minute she’ll be ready for high school and I will get whiplash. But I love the stage she’s at now and love that instead of being embarresed by my bringing her something, she was happy to see me. As she said, “I love my mommy”.

Right about now,  both my teens are  flexing their independence  muscles.  I don’t handle it well when the time I think they should be back has passed,  or when I think I should have heard from them and I haven’t. I get nudgy. I start my imagination on speed, coming up with terrible scenarios that just get more outrageous over the time that I am waiting. 

I know I have to let go and just understand that they are exploring their world. One that is much more restrictive than the one when I grew up in a large city. I took the city bus in 4rth grade every morning to school. I get nudgy when my son walks around the block and takes longer than half an hour. 

My mom waited up for each of us every time we went out and I loved coming home to her waiting, even when it was past my curfew.  In the time before cell phones I sometimes remembered to call. She’d be furious and relieved. My husband and I both have now waited up twice for our son to come home, something I know I will get more used to. I hope.

Time to use this perspective and take a deep breath.

Or get  GPS  locators injected into their arms.

She’s still a very happy girl. She certainly has her 13-year-old moments. About two years ago I had a catalytic moment that changed our relationship. I went from shouting and being harsh toward her to being much more loving and accepting. The moment that changed it all for me was being literally screamed at by someone two inches from my face. How horrific I felt and how helpless. At that moment I promised myself and then her that I wouldn’t yell at her again. Or shout or scream. At all. Before this my yelling at her came from me being frustrated and using that as permission to take it out on her.  As soon as I realized that instead of blowing I could tell her before I blew that I was getting frustrated and that I loved her but couldn’t continue the conversation until I could collect myself. It took a while but she eventually realized I would hold to my promise and that she could trust me to keep it. Then the hugs started and the ease in our relationship that I cherish every day. Of course we still have our friction but we’re keeping it together. I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

The light is waning now, dark very early and light after the kids are off to school. I love the sunshine but an overcast day adds so much texture.

About to go and have the school photo retaken for my teenaged son. The photo they took was so unlike him, with a odd head tilt making his neck look elongated. His expression looked like he was on some banned substance as well. Looking forward to seeing my son look like my son in the next version.